I was watching the new season of "Project Runway" with my friend Laura on Thursday night, and I had a light bulb moment as we watched the show. One of the designers, Chris March, created a beautiful clothing collection during the competition and he was absolutely shocked when he made it to one of the top four slots. He began groveling and questioning his right to be a part of the competition. He even began to cry a little bit. Then, Laura, in her trademark frustration, looks at the screen and says, "That makes me so mad. He's just like you. He doesn't recognize how great he is." Laura has said things like that to me a MILLION times, but it finally hit home when she said it to me that night.
I'm a person who LOVES to lavish praise and compiments on others, but I've always had the HARDEST time accepting a compliment because I sometimes feel like people are lying or just trying to make me feel good. My low thoughts and beliefs rise up and tell me that I can't possibly be this wonderful person that these people are claiming for me to be. But, I know that God brings people in my life to hold up a mirror and show me who I am now and who I can be. Like Chris, most of the time I find a way to shy away or devalue my worth when others compliment me, but slowly but surely I am learning to say "Thank you." I'm learning that it's easier to accept a compliment from a true friend than to find reasons to invalidate the gifts and joy that they can see but I'm too stubborn to value for myself.
When we shut down a compliment, basically we are telling the other person that he or she is a liar. We are telling them that we really don't hold any value in their lives. When I began looking at my reluctance to receive compliments from that perspective, it made me feel horrible for not accepting the God-given gifts that HE allows to share every day. For me, I know that as I continue to accept my role as a beaming, hilarious, positive, and motivating lady, my friends are more willing to open up and be the best that they are, too. Compliments are a great affirmation that who we are makes a difference in the world around us. And, if you have really good friends like I do, their compliments are truly some of the best gift to receive -- they're even better when we actually accept them.
If you are blessed to receive a compliment today, just say "Thank you." Accept it as your payment for doing your small part to shine your light today.
P.S., See, Laura, I DO listen to you!!!
I'm a person who LOVES to lavish praise and compiments on others, but I've always had the HARDEST time accepting a compliment because I sometimes feel like people are lying or just trying to make me feel good. My low thoughts and beliefs rise up and tell me that I can't possibly be this wonderful person that these people are claiming for me to be. But, I know that God brings people in my life to hold up a mirror and show me who I am now and who I can be. Like Chris, most of the time I find a way to shy away or devalue my worth when others compliment me, but slowly but surely I am learning to say "Thank you." I'm learning that it's easier to accept a compliment from a true friend than to find reasons to invalidate the gifts and joy that they can see but I'm too stubborn to value for myself.
When we shut down a compliment, basically we are telling the other person that he or she is a liar. We are telling them that we really don't hold any value in their lives. When I began looking at my reluctance to receive compliments from that perspective, it made me feel horrible for not accepting the God-given gifts that HE allows to share every day. For me, I know that as I continue to accept my role as a beaming, hilarious, positive, and motivating lady, my friends are more willing to open up and be the best that they are, too. Compliments are a great affirmation that who we are makes a difference in the world around us. And, if you have really good friends like I do, their compliments are truly some of the best gift to receive -- they're even better when we actually accept them.
If you are blessed to receive a compliment today, just say "Thank you." Accept it as your payment for doing your small part to shine your light today.
P.S., See, Laura, I DO listen to you!!!
I listen to Laura too, and not just because she lettered in rifle in college. OK, partly because of that, but not entirely.
ReplyDeleteBut she never told me I was all great and stuff.
Hm.
Guess you have to wait till you get that next baby before she compliments you again. Darn redheads!
ReplyDelete